suicide

Have you ever asked yourself what’s up with the alarming increase of depression, suicide, and anxiety when the self-help “section” of society is also booming?  There’s not a single store, mall, library, bookstore, medical building, or therapist’s office that doesn’t have a poster or magazine about the wonders of mindfulness, the anti-depressive qualities of meditation, and the availability of a groundbreaking treatment that tries to convince people that you shouldn’t feel “bad” because “bad” doesn’t exist.  From movies, to Netflix, to music videos, to talk shows, it seems like everyone is talking about the miraculous benefits of looking within, while the evidence to the practical ineffectiveness of that attitude is mounting.

Every year thousands of people line up with an extreme amount of excitement to get their hands on the newest iPhone, or the hip new gadget that will “change their lives forever.”  The interesting thing is that “forever” usually ends a few weeks later.  The pursuit of novelty is such a powerful force that some have made a career out of leaking the newest information just to give consumers a small taste of what they’ll eventually get tired of.  When we try to fill a bottomless existencial hole with “things” we are repeating to ourselves the same lie that has led countless other “things-searchers” to end up full of empty stuff, unable to sleep and with nobody to share the wealth with, which just adds to a valueless existence.We live in an age where we can see the final product of material abundance.  Like never before, this generation can have almost everything it wants; if not in a literal sense, at least in the virtual world.  Think about it; a regular postmodern Western lifestyle is absolutely prosperous.  That is not a bad thing.  I am thankful for the relative comfort and safety I enjoy every day, and for the opportunities I have in life.  But I would be foolish to think that commodities don’t have a psychological price.  Things can get out of hand fairly quickly.  The freedom we enjoy can slip into slavery before we know it.  Becoming shackled by things, position, and status, can happen to anyone who convinced themselves that their emptiness can be filled by them.

There are several indicators and studies showing that since the early 1900s, the rates of depression, hopelessness, and suicide have steadily gone up.  It is true that there’s always the problem of underdiagnosis in the beginning of the 20th century versus some overdiagnosis in the beginning of the 21st century.  However, the trend still remains, and it is relatively easy to notice. The media often covers stories giving evidence to this notion.  As mentioned before, movies, music, fashion, and TV shows seem to reflect this theme even more.

On the other hand, the increasing rates of depression appear to clash with what we think we know about happiness.  Think of all the ways life is better and easier than the early 1900s. Back then, if you wanted to communicate with your family member living in another state, you had to handwrite a letter, get on your horse (if you had one), ride to the post office to drop it off, and wait several days for it make the journey and be delivered.  Then wait several more days for a reply.  There were no fast food restaurants, supermarkets, pizza delivery, dishwashers, laundromats, and healthcare, to name a few. In a world where children played outside in the rain or snow, and their entertainment consisted of listening to grandpa’s stories infused with morality, there was little time for boredom.  And when they were “bored,” their minds had enough creativity to solve the problem quickly.

The point is that they didn’t have many options, so they made the best out of the ones they had.  Life was hard back then, in comparison to today, and people had to learn to adapt.  The need to make the most out of the little they had was replaced by a generation that makes the least out of the most it has. This attitude tends to slowly devalue the preciousness of life.  So many things are now either replaceable or disposable, that we start to act as if people and time itself are replaceable or disposable, leading us to ignore the need to invest our time in others, which inadvertently would benefit us socially and emotionally. By diminishing the value of values and increasing the value of vanity we continue digging ourselves a deeper hole in our psyche.

What’s the solution?  When I’m having a therapy session with someone, I often encourage them not to ask questions they already know the answers to.  Sometimes we do that to deceive ourselves, others, or to avoid thinking about something that will poke our comfort bubble.  I suspect this question is no different.  So, what is the solution?